He Called Me Sunshine

He called me Sunshine before he knew my name. Somehow it stuck.

"It suits you," he later said. "You bring sunshine to my life."

So I became his sunshine, if only for a moment in time. 

Our relationship was a roller coaster ride. For a while, the ride was all downhill, heart-jumping-out-of-your-chest kind of excitement. 

At 3 am each night before ending our 5 hour long conversations, he whispered sweet nothings in my ear. Sweet words that one day soon became nothing. Nothing more than empty words and broken promises.

"Sleep all day while I work, sweetheart."

"You're my sweetiest sweety in the world."

"Someday I will give you all my money and everything I own, honey."

"If I married you, I'd love you forever."

My mind was mush during those moments. I couldn't think clearly. I was only capable of feeling in my heart that no one else could be more perfect for me. But before I could begin processing what he said, those words were replaced by silence and brief, thoughtless responses. The ride from then on only became an endless, uphill anticipation to get to the top for the fun downhill rush of a descent. Except that moment never came again.

When the ride finally got to the top, it only came down crashing. Painfully hard. And of course, I crashed with it.

In the aftermath of that incredible crash, I'm picking up pieces of broken hopes and dreams. Some pieces are still missing, perhaps forever lost. But I will do my best to complete the puzzle once again, and fill the missing pieces with whatever I find along the way. And someday, my puzzle will be complete once again.