Reflections

Wow, this year is almost over! I seriously can't believe it. Each year seems to bring so many new changes. When I think about where I was a year ago and where I am now, I'm just amazed at how much has happened! I always like to go back and read through my journals and see what I was doing a year ago, and it's interesting to see how much I've learned and grown. Keeping a journal and writing often really is such a blessing! Not only is writing a good time to reflect on your day and a good chance to sit and think about the little as well as big things in life, but it's also a chance to learn about yourself- who you are, how you think, why you think certain things...it's a genuine picture of yourself that you may have been hiding from the rest of the world everyday. It's surprising how much you find out about yourself from reading past journal entries.

Anyways, that was not the point of my entry today. I was going to reflect upon this past year. The last year of the first decade of the twenty-first century. 2009. Lots have happened this year and lots of lessons have been learned. Perhaps the most important lesson is how truly involved the Lord is in my everyday life and how much He loves me personally. I can't think of a single experience that helped me realize this fact, but many small ones that have given me a testimony that Heavenly Father works miracles on our behalf all the time and we don't even realize it. He is always there, and we are sometimes just too busy and preoccupied with less important things to remember Him. I have learned how much sweeter and easier life is when we will seek His help and allow Him into our lives. To truly be a part of it. That is what I have learned this year.

Miracles

I can't express how grateful I am to have a Heavenly Father who listens and answers my prayers! Today one of my best friends who is on OPT that expires in May got a job offer from Goldman Sachs! She has been looking really hard for jobs for months and was starting to despair. I started praying for her, and she ended up getting a final round interview at Goldman Sachs randomly when she didn't even go to the initial ones. Today she got a call for a job offer! I know that Heavenly Father heard my prayers. I really believe this is nothing short of a miracle, especially in these hard economic times, and to have gotten a job at one of the most prestigious companies in that industry! I'm so happy for my friend and so grateful to be able to see how much our Father in Heaven loves us and watches over us. I have been stressed out about finding a job for myself as well this whole semester basically, but I know things will work out for me as well. Having the gospel in my life is one of my biggest blessings and brings me the greatest hope and joy!

Bad Girl

Well, looks like I've been a bad girl and have been neglecting my blog. Ah well, you know, life happens, and blogging is just not on the top of my to do list. I should be better though since I have so much time this semester! It has been heaven to not have to work. This semester's schedule has been the BEST! I get to sleep in pretty much every day. Not many tests, not a TON of hw, life can't get any better right? And I was so worried about not having a job. I worry too much. Things always works out. I was thinking the other day how blessed I've really been financially. I've always had a job, always been able to save up all my money, always had enough money to go on trips when I wanted to, found a nice place to live for a very good price (the nicest apartment I've ever seen around here in Provo), and now I have enough money to be moved out and not even have to work for a whole semester. I was actually worried I wouldn't have enough money to go on the study abroad thing for nursing in the Spring since i was expecting it to be at least $4000, but I found out last week that it's only gonna cost probably around $1500. I don't doubt all these blessings are because I've always been a full tithe payer. Heavenly Father really does bless us so much when we are obedient, and I'm very grateful.

Anyways, life has actually been very good being moved out from home. I have a much better social life. I'm not really close with my roommates or anyone in my ward actually, but other friends can come over a lot more often since I live so much closer. And I never realized how much more convenient it is to live so close to campus! I definitely enjoy it.

Well, other than that, not much going on here...I can't believe it's already the end of October!! Where did time go?? This semester is already more than half way over, which is just unbelievable to me. I am enjoying it too much for it to be half way done! Next semester I will have to start working again, which means no more sleeping in every day, and no more procrastinating and slacking off. But graduation is getting closer and closer...only one more year left!! I think about that everyday, and still can't believe it's gone by so fast. I will probably be moving out of UT in just about a year as well. CRAZY. I'm excited, but at the same time sad that this period of my life will be over before I know it. It's a good reminder to cherish the time and my life as it is now, because life is truly short and everything so often changes just too fast.

Anyways, life is good. I'm excited for Halloween and all the big holidays coming up. I don't feel much like blogging anymore, so I guess I will stop now. But I promise to try to be better and update more often!

sTrEeSsssssEd

Didn't think moving out just TEN minutes away from home would make me feel so stressed! Just 10 minutes...I miss my family already. I feel so lonely at my new apartment even though I'm rarely there. I moved in on Saturday but I have been procrastinating the day that I'll actually sleep there, and tonight is the night. I hope I don't cry myself to sleep. Ha..ha...jk. I won't. I just kinda miss my room. My bed....my house...... :( Even though my new room is actually bigger and nicer than my room at home. I got a NEW queen sized mattress, dresser, desk, bookshelf, and carpet. And I get a much bigger closet and my own bathroom as well. I do consider myself quite lucky to have found this place for such a good price, but I still miss my own home!! I will like it better once I have gotten used to living there. One thing I'm liking though is how much closer I am to campus. It's definitely nice.

Last week of summer

Well I got back from NY and DC last Wednesday, but obviously have been neglecting my blog. It was a very...don't know if I can exactly use the word "fun" for this trip, but it was definitely interesting. The word I'd use to describe it is tiring more than anything, but it was very cool seeing all these famous sites. Can't really think of the favorite place I visited...we visited so many in such a short period of time so we didn't stay anywhere too long.

Well, probably weird, but my favorite part might've been all the plane rides I got to go on! We flew on a total of 6 planes on this trip (SLC-Detroit, Detroit-Buffalo, Buffalo-NYC, DC-Buffalo, Buffalo-Atlanta, Atlanta-SLC. Don't know why I even bothered to list them all out, but you know, just in case you were interested). There is just something about being on a plane thousands of feet above the sky that I just LOVE. By the end of the trip, I still found looking out the window of the plane fascinating. Just such a different perspective, you know? I get excited everytime when the plane takes off. And bumpy plane rides are AWESOME! So much fun! Hehe. And out of all the airlines we flew on, Jetblue was definitely by far the best. So much cleaner, better service, better food and drinks, more channels on TV...If you can choose Jetblue, do it! It was awesome.

I won't write too much about the places we visited, since honestly, no where stuck out to me too much. Go on my Facebook to see the pictures of all the places I visited. I am too lazy to do a recap here, and plus, I HAVE NO TIME!!

It's the LAST week of summer. LAST. I can't even believe it! I'm not as sad anymore and not trying as hard to deny that truth. I think I'm almost ready for a new semester to begin along with the many new changes in my life. Life is about change afterall. So much to do this week, I don't even know if I'll have time to do it all. On top of it all, I'm moving out the end of this week so I have to pack. Too much to do in so little time!! I really kinda don't wanna think about it, but I better. Need to plan out what I'm doing every day so I can get it all done!

And not looking forward so much to my nursing classes this semester. In fact I'm kinda dreading it. Can I just say that BYU nursing classes SUCK?! So very unorganized and it is extremely frustrating. I should stop complaining though since I'm lucky enough to actually be in the program. Ah well, I better stop here before I ramble on and on about all the things that are wrong with those dumb nursing classes. Wish me luck this week. Later.

I Can't Wait to Fall in Love...

with NYC!! Leaving tomorrow at 5 am for the airport! So excited!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We'll be gone for 8 days (Niagara Falls, NYC, and DC), and then the day after I get back I'm heading to Vegas. For the 3rd time this year. Man, someone goes a bit too often. I went Dec 07, April 08, July 08, Jan 09, April 09, and Aug 09. Jeez. I think I've gone enough times to last me the rest of my life. Not that I even like Vegas all that much. I mean, obviously not like I drink or party or go clubbing or gamble...so what do I do in Vegas? Basically the same thing every single time...don't know how I can still stand hanging out in Sin City in the super disgustingly hot weather. Ugh. Its even 100 degrees at night! Can't imagine living there...but I think after this time, I'm good for a LONG while. But lets not think too far ahead now, cuz I have NYC to look forward to!! :)))))))

17 or 22?

This summer I've been getting so many people telling me I look like I'm either still in high school or just got out of high school. Before that, I've never had anyone tell me that. I always thought I at least looked my age, but apparently not. It's pretty interesting, since my YOUNGER sister and I have been working at the same place these past couple of months, and every single person has thought that she is older than me. Are they saying I'm more immature than my sister?? Is it the way I dress? The way I act? The way I talk? Or just because my face is rounder? Maybe all of the above. I do get sick of people telling me how young I look, but then again I'm also getting used to it. Just wait 5 or 10 years and I will be grateful to people telling me that. In the long run, I suppose I'd rather be the one looking younger rather than older. Just gotta look at the big picture, right? See, having the right perspective and attitude changes everything.

Facebook Addict

I wonder what my life would be like without Facebook. Pathetic, right? But really.

I mean, what would I do to fill up all the auto-in time during work? Or when I'm bored to death at home? Or when I need a break from studying? Or want to find out what's going on in the lives of now strangers whom I used to be good friends with? Or need to contact people whose numbers I don't have? Or need to find long lost friends or even family members? Or if I feel like sharing with the world what's on my mind? Or want to stalk an unsuspecting victim? Or want to show off pictures of awesome places I've visited or the fun I've been having? Or see if someone's popular enough to be my friend? Or when I have an urge to bombard someone's wall? Or want to know someone's birthday? Or announce to everyone my bday is coming up so they can have a present prepared for me? Or do mass invites to silly events that most people just ignore? Or want to click on the interesting (or weird) ads on the side (I just saw an ad titled "Where to pee in NY" to help you find the best public restrooms in the city...)? Or want to hack into my enemy's acct and make them look like a fool to all their friends?

Ah. The things you can do with Facebook. What would I do without it?

SUMMER Summer summer..........

Quickly dwindling away...I really was so sad thinking about all the things I'll be leaving behind once school starts again. So many new changes awaiting me...new place to live, new ward, new classes, new schedule, new job (hopefully). It will surely be a new adventure, but I'm not sure I'm ready for summer to be over already. But alas, time has no mercy and unflinchingly marches on...on and on and on at a quicker and quicker pace. I always feel like I'm breathlessly trying to catch up, but to no avail. I look back at this summer and wonder what I've done with it. It's gone by so quickly I can't even seem to recall what exactly has happened these summer months.

Although one thing I'll remember about this summer is this: FUN! This has quite possibly been the best summer of my life. Instead of only work work work, I also played played played! I actually seemed to keep myself quite busy as well doing fairly productive things. I made some goals for myself for this summer, though unfortunately, I only acheived a few of them. I was quite determined to do all of them at the beginning, but like usual, by the 3rd week of summer my motivation was lacking. At least I did complete a few, right?

Goals for Summer 2009:
1. Exercise 5x a week- FAIL. Big fat failure I was this summer...I blame it on my early work schedule. What? You don't expect me to get up at 4 am to get my work out in, do you? And of course since I work so early, I am too tired so I need my daily 2 hr nap. And if I work out after I wake up, how am I supposed to have time to actually have fun if I still need to WORK OUT, right?
2. Go to the temple every week- YES!! Well, except for one week. I still feel bad about skipping that once...but I have been going every week since the end of April! This has truly changed my life I tell you. I really think this has been the reason why I've had the best summer of my life!
3. Read 5 books- Yes yes yes. Read a couple of good books. Not just mindless reading, mind you. Two particular books I especially want to mention are the ones I read by Sheri Dew- No One Can Take Your Place and No Doubt About It. Although they are directed at women, they were both incredibly inspiring books that helped me see my potential and that we were all sent here to earth at this time for a purpose with a specific mission to fulfill. Yes, it made me feel special, but also helped me see the difference I can make in this world and gave me motivation to work harder, try harder to be what the Lord expects me to be. I highly recommend her books!
4. Learn 2 new piano pieces- erm...not so much. I did finish learning one piece (Claire de Lune by Debussy), but it is by far from perfection. I can play it all the way through, but that's basically it. I have pretty much sucked at practicing this summer...or for the past 2 years...
5. Learn to cook 5 new things- Success! I learned to make chocolate truffles (heavenly...so easy to make too), chocolate hazelnut biscotti's, orange cranberry scones, and a few Chinese dishes.
6. Volunteer somewhere once a week- Not so much...Does doing baptisms for the dead weekly count?
7. Find a class I'm interested in and go to the lectures- another failure. I got too lazy...

I think that was it for my goals...3 1/2 out of 7 isn't too shabby, right? Alright, 50%= FAIL but just let me believe otherwise and life is good.

My Bucket List

I finally decided to make a blog. Just cuz everyone else is doing it, so why not, right? Just a warning though if you decide to follow my blog, I tend to write a lot. I can ramble on and on and on endlessly and mercilessly about anything and everything. Really. And most likely my ramblings will be mostly about my feelings and thoughts rather than the happenings of my life. You can stop here if you don't want a piece, ok, more like very large slice, of my mind thrown at you. Well, you've been warned.

The other day I was reading a book (yes, an actual book. Not a textbook. Surprisingly I've found lots of time to read this summer), and I thought, "You know what an awesome thing to add to my bucket list would be? Writing a book and getting it published!" Don't know where I get these sudden inspirations since I never had that desire before. In fact, I thought I hated writing until I realized that it was just academic papers I disliked organizing and researching and coming up with (that I contribute to laziness), but that I actually really LIKE the writing part. In fact, I have 20+ journals to prove it. I can write pages and pages and pages about the same subject until I've analyzed the topic to death, just to resurrect it and start all over again the next day. And perhaps the next as well. Now I realized how much I depend on my writing to release all the feelings and emotions I have kept inside during the day that I didn't have a chance to express out loud. Writing is such a wonderful thing. I'm glad I finally came to understand that.

Anyways, I never actually made a bucket list before, and now that I have my very first thing on the list, I must not stop the inspiration from coming. Well, here I go.

1. Write a book and publish it

2. Travel to all 7 continents

3. Go on many humanitarian trips all over the world, but especially China

4. Learn to play the violin

5. Make a wedding cake

6. Go skydiving

7. Paint a big painting good enough to be hung on a wall

8. Be able to speak both Cantonese and Mandarin fluently

9. Be a phenomenal cook

10. Open my own bakery/pastry shop

That's a good list for now. I'm sure I will have more to add later.

You got lucky today, because I think i'll actually stop here for now. Until next time.